Some Thoughts on Mother's Day

Today is Mother’s Day, but my mother, Julie, has been gone for 2 years now and my mother-in-law, Jennie, has been gone since 2004.  It is touching to see all the Facebook posts of people with their Mothers today, but it is also a little sad.  We are reminded that we don’t have the opportunity to tell our moms how much we love them and appreciate them. We are fortunate that we were close to our moms and have lots of good memories, but memories can never replace a kiss, a hug or your mother's voice on the other side of the phone.

Me with my mother Julie 

Mom with my brothers Jerry & Terry

                 

My Mother-in-law Jennie with James, George and Sheri

                                                                        

From a distance, however, we are appalled at the marketing frenzy that began last month and implies that you can only show your mother how much you love her by finding that perfect gift that will symbolize 1. What a good child you still are, 2. How wonderful she is, 3. That this gift somehow pays her back for the sacrifices she had to make to raise you to adulthood. We’ve actually corrupted all of our holidays and morphed them into little more than shopping opportunities.  We have allowed ourselves to be transformed from citizens to consumers. How sad is it that today, many mothers had to work at low paying jobs in retail and food service so others can go through the proscribed motions of buying the card and flowers, going to brunch and doing some shopping?  When do those mothers get their day?  What if everything was closed today so people could actually spend time doing things together – cooking, going to the beach, going for a picnic, bicycling, going for a walk, playing a game or doing a jigsaw puzzle? How many mothers would just love to have a whole day just to be with their loved ones?

If we really want to support mothers, why don’t we as a society do things that would actually help mothers in every stage of their lives?  Some things that come to my mind immediately include making sure that all women and families:

• have access to prenatal care
• have  family friendly maternity and sick leave policies at their jobs
• have access to affordable healthcare
• have access to affordable daycare
• earn a living wage
• have access to locally grown food
• have access to reliable, frequent public transportation
• have access to affordable housing that is close to transportation, services and groceries
• have access to affordable elder care and senior services

    

When we decide that providing these benefits to all of our citizens is more important than getting a great deal on flowers, perfume, jewelry, candy or some other trinket that our moms don’t really want or need, and when we decide that these issues are more important than corporate welfare and empire building, we will have evolved to the point where we can truly call ourselves a great country.